‘Fear is just False Evidence Appearing Real.’
Have you ever worried about something so much that it actually happened the way you thought and turned into a nightmare for you? Like fear of losing your job or a loved one. From fear of street dogs to fear of failure in life, from fear of uncertainty in life to fear of failing, everyone has got their fears to deal with. Some of us are great at handling our worries while some stop and hold back.
Now, take a moment and imagine how your life would feel if you had no fear. What would you do? How would you plan to drive your life?
Well, let me explain this to you this. First let us understand why it becomes so dear to us in our lives. Fear is the most basic yet a tricky emotion of a human life to deal with. It is like the uninvited guest that stays for months at a stretch and is tough to get rid of. You are just stuck in a situation which looks like never coming to an end. Fear is just another human condition which doesn’t feel good at all.
Fear in life can be a source of motivation, but too much of it can lead to stress, anxiety and loss of self confidence. Well, the good news is that most of our fears are just our brain brewing up illogical reasons for the reluctant changes or uneasiness in life.
But where does fear come from?
Our ability to think, learn and analyze is the real cause creating fear in our minds. In my view, fear is the single biggest emotion that has torn us, taken over us all at some point of time in our lives. We scare or populate our subconscious mind by imagining the worst possible outcomes of anything leading to fear. Some of us might be dealing with a situation in the past that has caused us to worry so much, while some of us might be distressed due a present day scenario.
Sit and reflect to a time where you were so worried or fearful of doing something, but once you did it you were like, “Wohoo, that wasn’t so bad. Why did I spend so long worrying about it?!” Now, in this scenario you chose to fight back your fear and be courageous.
In the words of Stephanie Melish, “Fear is an idea crippling, experience-crushing, success-stalling inhibitor inflicted only by yourself.”
Identifying a fear is the most crucial part of a well being. The first step to overcome a fear in your life is to acknowledge it. Constant fear of something can add on to anxiety which further stops you in your tracks and holds you back. It’s not always easy to face your fears and push through them. The imagined situations and their outcomes in our minds feed the fear. We let this emotion in our mind rule us, control us and even drive us.
When I observed fear as an action not just in my life but also in those around me, it helped me to deal with this emotion in a better and positive way. Fear for some seems to drive so much of how an individual lives, thinks and functions in a day-to-day life. Think about it! If you have a fear, you are constantly worrying of what shall happen next, however, the real focus to make that thing happen changes to what if this does not happen. Allowing fear to drive the entire course of action in your future.
Life becomes a little more magical when you slow down to witness the world around you- minute by minute, hour by hour. Changing the perspective of thinking can turn can help you conquer your fear. Remember, fear is nothing but a reaction that starts in your brain and spreads through the entire body to prepare a defense. This is nothing but your brain releasing extreme emotion of fear as a response.
In my personal experience, I too used to constantly keep worrying and thinking about “what next.” The fear of uncertainty in the future had taken over me and my work, but lately I’ve been practising on how to embrace the moment by not dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. My situation hasn’t changed much, but one critical thing has: I’ve changed my attitude.
The funny thing about fear is that it’s merely a situation created in your imagination. The event itself hasn’t even happened in my life but yet i have been constantly thinking about it. But each time I started slipping into the fearful patterns, I reminded myself to stop and think that ‘Fear is just False Evidence Appearing Real.’
Over the past couple of years I have tried to focus on what makes me happy and have started to finally cherish the things I love rather than worry about the future. My fears told me all sorts of lies about myself, from not being productive enough at work to not having anything to offer a partner.
Through my courses from Jay Shetty, Tony Robins and my daily practice I am learning to become my #1 supporter, as it is much easier to love others when you love yourself first.
My fears have started to slip away, and my faith has given me confidence to build better relationships and succeed in life. Regards to fear, I learned a while back that anything that you fear, will eventually be manifested into your life. Fears once controlled me and can’t catch me at all. Believe me it will.
Reflect on your life and see if any fears you had in the past have come to pass, and if so, what did you learn and glean from that experience? I bet you gained a greater sense of confidence from your ability to deal with something you thought would be the scariest and worst thing to ever to go through.
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